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Dogman, Monkeying Around, & Funny Facebook Statuses

December 9, 2011

Enjoy the weekend share these…

20 Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  1. I once had a life … then some idiot came and told me to make a Facebook!  (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  2. 1600s: Oh Dearest Romeo, I write to inform you that I have received your letter and I’ve been left quite speechless. 2011: K
  3. True love is being able to hate the same things together.
  4. Dear radio stations, instead of 40 minutes of commercial free music, how about 5 minutes of good music?
  5. “I got 99 chores and I aint did one” – Lay Z
  6. I hate when people text me first and then don’t keep the conversation going.
  7. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
  8. Life is like a roll of toilet paper.The closer you get to the end the faster it goes.
  9. Everyone has that “make the other person sound incredibly stupid” voice when describing an argument.
  10. Some people might as well post “Wants Attention” as their Facebook status.  (187+Likes in 13 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  11. Relationships nowadays: First month, I love you baby! Second month, we are forever! Third month, Single.
  12. Whatisthelongbuttonatthebottomofthekeyboardfor?
  13. By the time a man realises that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he’s wrong.
  14. I don’t care how much pain you are in, if you hurt yourself in a hilarious way, I’m laughing.
  15. I ALWAYS wonder if someone, somewhere, is doing the same exact thing as I AM.
  16. Yesterday was National Day of the Ninja and I was completely unaware of it. Well played Ninja Day… well played.
  17. I only say, “that makes sense,” because I refuse to say, “you are right”.
  18. If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.
  19. ＰＥＡＣＥ ☮ ＬＯＶＥ ❤ H A P P I N E S S   (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  20. 3 words, 8 letters, say it and I’m yours. “I got food”

Just Monkeying Around…

Monkeying Around

Haha! Poor little monkey isn’t going anywhere fast. Post to your FB Wall and see what your friends think of that adorable little trouble maker.

Probably the funniest dog video you’ll see this month…

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Share that with your Facebook friends and watch the LIKEs and comments roll in!

Need more funny statuses, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Use our great Facebook App  for 11,001+ more Facebook status updates! Have a great weekend we’ll see you Monday for more Funny Status Updates!

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Goose Parade, Sneaky Cat, & Funny Statuses

November 21, 2011

Get the LIKEs you deserve share these…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Team Jacob ✖, Team Edward ✖, Team Guy that almost ran Bella over with his car ✔ (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • I love it when I buy a bag of air, and the company is nice enough to put chips in it.
  • Facebook relationship status should have the option: “is getting played by_______”
  • “get off the phone so I can use the Internet” if you’ve uttered those words before…you’re old.
  • That nervous feeling you get when you talk to someone you really like on the phone for the first time.
  • People are funny. They spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t need, to impress people they don’t like.
  • That awkward moment when your mom compares you to another kid and yet she has NO idea how much worse they are than you.
  • Alcohol: Because no good story starts with “So this one time I was eating a salad….”  (90+Likes in 13 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • All I want for Christmas is you….lol jk i need a new phone.
  • Very little happens at 3 o’clock in the morning, but when it does, it’s usually very memorable.
  • I like Mario, he’s cool. He’s an Italian plumber created by Japanese people, who speaks English and looks like a Mexican.
  • The most impressive thing about marathon runners is how they don’t check Facebook or Twitter for 3+ hours.
  • “Requires a Facebook account” is like “Best viewed in Netscape 4.”
  • A recent survey of one person revealed that 100% of me thinks that I should leave work early.
  • Life is all about butts, You’re either covering it, Laughing it off, Kicking it, Kissing it, Busting it, Or trying to get a piece of it..
  • A lot of people I went to high school w/ are getting married & having kids. A lot of people I went to high school w/ are idiots.
  • Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.  (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • “Typing ‘ROFL’ after every sentence.” But still sitting on the chair.

Sneaking In…

Cat Sneaks In

 

Verrrrry verrrrrry sneaky! Post to your FB wall to see what your friends think.

The Great Goose Parade:

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Imagine seeing this in front of your eyes! Share that awesome video with your friends on Facebook and watch the comments & LIKEs pour in :)

Craving more funny statuses, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Use our amazing Facebook App  for 11,001+ of Facebook statuses to choose from!

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Best Friends, Big Dog, & Funny Statuses

November 18, 2011

Get the LIKEs you deserve share these…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • “Dad, I`m hungry.” “Hi, Hungry. I`m Dad.” “Dad, I`m serious.” “I thought you were Hungry?” “Are you kidding me?” “Nope, I`m Dad.” (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • Bacon. The word alone deserves its own status.
  • I’m not addicted to Facebook. I only time I update my status is when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time
  • I have always wondered what I sound like to people who don’t speak English.
  • Posting philosophical statuses doesn’t make you wise, it makes you annoying.
  • I dont make typos. I make new words.
  • I would have no friends left if they could ever hear my inner thoughts.   (120+Likes in 9 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • I just saved a ton of money on my car insurance! (By driving away and not leaving a note)
  • Does anyone else get scared when a text reads “Can I ask you a question?”
  • I always clear my computer’s history before doing something dangerous, you know, just in case.
  • The self-checkout line was a miracle for the condom industry.
  • The awkward moment when someone knocks on the bathroom door.
  • When you think you have someone eating out of your hand, count your fingers. (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • If you’re boring, we can’t be friends.

Tiberian Mastiff going hard in the paint:

Tiberian Mastiff

 

Wow, what a BEAST! Post on your FB wall and see what your Facebook friends think.

Horse & Dog Play Nice:

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Can’t we all just get along?!?! How awesome is that :) two best friends just getting along. Share with your Facebook friends and see what they think.

Need more funny statuses, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Use our great Facebook App  for 11,001+ more Facebook status updates! Have a great weekend we’ll see you Monday for more Funny Status Updates!

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Cobra Cat, Vision Test, & LIKEable Status Updates

November 16, 2011

Get more LIKEs share these…

LIKEable Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Thank goodness pets can’t talk, they all know too much. (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • Dance like the picture’s not being tagged. Love like you’ve never been unfriended. Tweet like no one’s following.
  • My parents taught me to give my toys to the less fortunate… that’s why I never get jealous when I see my ex with someone else.
  • Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do and you know better what the best for you.
  • Finding the right partner isn’t about finding someone perfect, it’s about finding someone whose flaws and vices are compatible with mine.
  • Grad school is another way of saying “Screw Job Hunting.”
  • LIKE if you hate when you’re listening to music really loud and you have to keep pausing it because you constantly think you’re hearing your name being called.  (234+Likes in 15 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • If I could have one super power it would be the ability to literally smack sense into people.
  • Like nature and opportunities, when booty calls, I answer.
  • Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.
  • If Johnny Cash were alive today. He’d probably just be known as Johnny Credit/Debit.
  • When you settle for less, you’ll never know what greatness feels like.
  • The fabric of Winners is made from the thread called Failure.
  • The brain is the most outstanding organ. It works for 24 hours, 365 days, right from your birth until you fall in love.
  • Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose. (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Crazy people are always the last to know they’re crazy.

11,001+ Killer Status Updates…

Awesome Vision Test, Do you see Einstein or Marilyn Monroe?

Vision Test

How neat is that? Share with your friends on Facebook and ask what they see!

Crouching Tiger, Hidden COBRA Cat??!?

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The only explanation is that this Cat is somehow related to Chuck Norris. Post on your wall and see how many LIKEs you get.

Craving more funny statuses, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Use our amazing Facebook App  for 11,001+ of Facebook statuses to choose from!

Filed Under: Facebook Status Updates Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Balanced Dog, Tea Time, & Funny Statuses

November 4, 2011

Be an Internet Celebrity post these…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • If my room is clean, it means that Facebook is not working.  (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • It’s amazing how much I can get done in the hour and a half before I’m expecting someone over.
  • Switch their facebook relationship status from single to taken just for attention. #AttentionWhore
  • LIKE IF you hate texting people first.
  • LMS = Like My Status
  • Life is not about understanding or doing it right. It’s about taking what you’ve got and just smiling about it anyway.
  • I’m at my wit’s end. And let me say it didn’t take long for me to get here either.
  • I am a firm believer that anything wrapped in bacon ultimately tastes better.
  • Guys who still carry bags, open doors, tell their girl that she’s beautiful, and show respect… Real Men.
  • ❒ Taken ❒ Single ✔ I’m in love with my computer. It’s getting pretty serious.
  • Be strong and try your hardest, because in the end, gold looks better than silver and it’s all worth it.
  • Lazy Rule #33: If ice falls, kick it under the fridge. (174+Likes in 7 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
  • Coin always makes sound but the currency notes are always silent. So when your value increases, keep yourself calm.
  • You are not fully dressed until you wear a smile.
  • Experience is simply the name we give to our mistakes.
  • If you ever get caught sleeping on the job… slowly raise your head and say, “In Jesus name, amen,”
  • The one who says it can’t be done should never interrupt the one doing it.
  • Base your hopes on action, not on your dreams.
  • Go to Google.com and type “Do A Barrel Roll” DO IT. Share this post and spread the word! (VIA Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )

Care for some tea?

Tea Cat

 

Clever Cats just keep getting smarter and smarter. Post to Facebook & see what your friends think of this hilarious cat pic.

A Very Well Balanced Dog:

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Ah-mah-zing! That is spectacular and adorable at the same time. Share on your wall and see what your friends think!

Awesome Free Unreleased NES Game: The Great Gatsby

Need more funny statuses, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Use our great Facebook App  for 11,001+ more Facebook status updates! Have a great weekend we’ll see you Monday!

Filed Under: Facebook Status Updates Tagged With: , , , , , ,
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