Step your status game up, share these…
20 Ridiculous Facebook Posts:
- Government shutdown day 8: Electricity still works. Water is still running. No cool gangs to join yet.
Worst apocalypse ever.
- That awkward moment when everything is silent and your phone goes off.
- Just keep scrolling. Got nothing.
- It’s called sarcasm, and it confuses stupid people.
- Usually relationships end when people get tired of pretending to be the person their partner likes.
- I think I dislocated my dignity.
- I strongly believe that when the crosswalk timer runs out a trapdoor should open and swallow the people who failed to make it across in time.
- Be honest, you haven’t even walked a mile in your own shoes.
- Nice to see so many people putting so much effort into accomplishing nothing. Keep up the good work.
- It would serve me better if they put shopping carts in the middle of the store where my pride realizes I have too much shit to carry.
- Recipe for the greatest nights:
- I miss you, but I’d rather not bother you.
- I’m not perfect. I’m original.
- Strict parents create the sneakiest kids.
- Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone.
- How I put on my pants: *Left leg*, *Right leg*, ” Wiggle*, *Wiggle*, *Jump*, *Jump*, *Squat*, *Stretch* Done.
- Things I’m bad at: singing. Things I do a lot: sing.
- “Please, tell me more about the drama in your life via Facebook.” -Nobody, ever.
- If you still think about it, you still care about it.
- I like turtles because they’re so chill. They don’t hurt anyone. They’re just like, Hey man, I want to swim, and maybe eat some lettuce.
Love to see pups in nature! So cute :)
EPIC Coffee Shop Prank
That’s a great viral advertisement for the upcoming movie, Carrie! Are you going to see it now??? Or, are you scared?