Funny Status Updates for Facebook. Hilarious Comedic Witty Status Updates about Life, Love, and everything in-between.

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A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's...That's because she changes it more often.

Women Status Updates

05/09/2013

A pretty face gets old, a nice body changes, but a good woman will always be a good woman.

Women Status Updates

05/08/2013

Scary things women say to men: 1. Where are you? 2. We need to talk. 3. Let me see your phone!

Women Status Updates

05/07/2013

Chapstick, bobby pins & hair ties are by far the hardest things to keep up with.

Women Status Updates

04/23/2013

I think I missed out on the “neat and cute handwriting” gene that every girl seems to have.

Women Status Updates

04/21/2013

The easiest way to distract a woman is to show her a picture of herself.

Women Status Updates

04/15/2013

Women don't want to hear what you think...Women want to hear what they think- in a deeper voice.

Women Status Updates

04/10/2013

My swimsuit told me to go to the gym. But my sweatpants were like, nah girl, you're good!

Women Status Updates

04/10/2013

If you think I talk too much, let me know. We can talk about it.

Women Status Updates

04/03/2013

A woman without curves is like jeans without pockets...you don't know where to put your hands.

Women Status Updates

04/03/2013

Men say that women should come with instructions... What's the point? Have you ever seen a man actually read them???

Women Status Updates

03/26/2013

If she replies to your sarcasm with sarcasm instead of just getting offended.... She's a keeper!

Women Status Updates

03/19/2013

FACT: The faster a girl mentions that she has a boyfriend, the more creeped out she is by you.

Women Status Updates

03/04/2013

A woman always worries about the things that men forget and men always worry about the things women remember.

Women Status Updates

02/27/2013

It doesn't take much to make a woman happy, but it takes even less to make her mad.

Women Status Updates

02/17/2013

Women are like terminators when they get angry they can't be bargained with. they can't be reasoned with. they dont feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until..... you admit you are wrong!

Women Status Updates

02/13/2013

The only thing I know about women is that they have lots of feelings and they're not afraid to tell you about each and every one of them.

Women Status Updates

02/12/2013

Whenever a woman says "do whatever you want" do NOT do whatever you want.

Women Status Updates

01/22/2013

Absolutely no one can text faster than a pissed off woman.

Women Status Updates

01/22/2013

Don't try to understand women… Women understand women and they hate each other.

Women Status Updates

01/14/2013

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