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Next time you're asked "What's Up" respond "A delightful animated film about a young boy and an old man who fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house."

Movies / Televison Status Updates

10/07/2012

If I ever put stuff in storage I'm going to write "gold bars" and "priceless memorabilia" on the boxes just to mess with Storage Wars on A&E.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/30/2012

There would be fewer problems with children if they had to chop wood to keep the television set going.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/24/2012

So there's a film where a man's wife is brutally murdered by a serial killer and his son his left physically disabled. In a twist of events the son is kidnapped and kept in a tank while his father chases the kidnapper thousands of miles with the help of a mentally challenged woman. Finding Nemo is quite the thriller...

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/24/2012

I spend more time actually looking for a movie on Netflix than actually watching it.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/19/2012

She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her enough or something. I don't know. I wasn't really paying attention.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/18/2012

I don't ever want to hear a guy ask why girls always go to the bathroom in big groups. Hermione Granger went to the bathroom by herself, and was attacked by a troll.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/11/2012

Liam Neeson trained Batman, Obi Wan, and Darth Vader. He is both Aslan and Zeus…and he punches wolves. Why would you kidnap his family?

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/10/2012

If you had to die, this would be the best way...Clint Eastwood shooting you while Morgan Freeman narrates it.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

08/09/2012

If Wyle E Coyote had enough cash to buy all that ACME stuff why didn’t he just buy dinner?

Movies / Televison Status Updates

07/30/2012

If sitting on the couch with no pants on, eating pizza, and watching TV is a crime, then I will get out of this Best Buy right now.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

07/27/2012

They should make a show like cash cab called Cats cab where people get into a taxi and a cat is driving and all of these flashing lights go off, but instead of answering questions everyone dies because cats can't drive.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

07/16/2012

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is easily the worst thing to happen to President Lincoln in a theatre.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

07/13/2012

It's a crazy day when guys wanna see a movie about a teddy bear and girls wanna see a movie about strippers.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

07/09/2012

Live like SPONGEBOB. Laugh out loud all day without any reason and annoy the mean people with your happiness.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

06/22/2012

LIKE if you always dreamed of being slimed on Nickelodeon.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

06/19/2012

Coming up next on SportsCenter, the same stuff we’ve been showing you for the past four hours.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

06/17/2012

When I have children i'm going to make them watch the movie 2012 and tell them I survived that.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

06/09/2012

"You won't like me when I'm angry. Because I always back up my rage with facts and documented sources." -The Credible Hulk

Movies / Televison Status Updates

05/08/2012

Live like SPONGEBOB. Laugh out loud all day without any reason and annoy the mean people with your happiness.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

04/29/2012

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