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Go to Google Translate. Set translate from English to Japanese. Type I HATE YOU into the translate box. Then laugh.

Computer Status Updates

05/26/2011

Let's pretend to get together soon.

Life Status Updates

12/19/2011

Does anyone else feel like Marge Simpson when they have their wet hair in a towel on top of their head?

Misc. Status Updates

05/26/2011

She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her enough or something. I don't know. I wasn't really paying attention.

Movies / Televison Status Updates

09/18/2012

That awkward moment when sluts hate on other sluts for being sluts.

Awkward Moment When

10/15/2012

When you said, "The dishwasher was loaded." I thought you meant my wife was drunk.

Relationship Status Updates

10/25/2012

Imma stop being a procrastinator... Starting next week

Facebook Status Updates

06/14/2011

There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safe...call in sick tomorrow.

Work Status Updates

01/14/2013

Be yourself, you already have the costume.

Silly Status Updates

09/06/2012

Our argument would be more impressive if either one of us knew what we're talking about.

Relationship Status Updates

11/15/2011

The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: Management.

Work Status Updates

05/26/2011

I'm still waiting for the day that I will actually use x² + y +8 [(x + 2y ² = a-z] + 2x ³ + (- 2z = 2. 4) + 10y - 5Z ³= k= 9 in real life.

School Status Updates

11/11/2012

Treat me like a joke, and I'll leave you like it's funny.

Relationship Status Updates

12/03/2012

Everyone in life is gonna hurt you, you just have to figure out which people are worth the pain!

Relationship Status Updates

08/05/2011

Everyday is a great day to curl up with a really good book and then completely ignore it because, ya know, the Internet.

Computer Status Updates

01/13/2013

Are the Pringles and Monopoly guy related?

Pop Culture Status Updates

03/24/2013

If something cool happens and you don't share it on Facebook, did it actually happen?

Facebook Status Updates

11/29/2011

The friend request waiting period on Facebook is only fun when youre the one in control.

Facebook Status Updates

05/26/2011

Mom: Ive been here four hours and you havent put your phone down once. How do you always miss my calls?

Misc. Status Updates

05/26/2011

I’m sorry Winter… I take it all back.

Misc. Status Updates

07/16/2012

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