Rescue Hound, Video Games, and On Point Status Updates

Editorial Team

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On Point Facebook Status Updates:

We’ve officially reached that annoying time in the year where it’s sweater weather in the morning, but by midday you die from a heatstroke.
Don’t like my sarcasm? Well, I don’t like your stupid.
I wanted to work out but then I wanted to not work out more.
It’s always a good day when you come across someone that you can unfriend on Facebook.
If I had a dollar for every bad date I’ve been on, I wouldn’t have to date anymore because I’d be independently wealthy.
Nearly finished with your makeup. Mascara wand brushes your cheek. LIFE OVER.
I’m going to switch my insurance from Geico to Allstate, then Statefarm, then back to Geico. If i’m correct, they should owe me $950.
It saddens me that today’s youth will never have to endure the character-building pain of waiting for dial-up Internet to connect.
I call my fists Thunder & Lightning because there’s about a one in a million chance that they’ll cause any damage.
You can’t turn a lesson into love but if you’re not careful you might turn a love into a lesson.
My shower only has two options: 3rd degree burns or skinny dipping in Antarctica.
Alien 1: Did the humans get our message?
Alien 2: Yes, But they named it Dubstep and they dance to it.
Remember when you thought you’d have it all together by the time you were the age you are now? LOL
I’m getting tired of fat people doing laps around the all-you-can-eat buffet in their little scooters.
The youth of today have it way too easy. Just once I would like to see them have to go through the trouble of blowing into a video game just to make it work.
It’s called a “remote” because those are your odds of finding it when you want to change the channel.
Chinese food to go: $16.84. Gas to go get it: $1.62. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of your containers: Riceless.
My Mama is gonna be pissed when she realizes how much drama I have saved for her.
The next person I hear say “I love fall” is getting choked out with a scarf soaked in pumpkin spice latte.
3 more payments to Whole Foods and that Naked Juice is so mine.