Make your friends LOL, pick one and share it…
20 Clever Facebook Statuses:
- Love is like Wi-Fi, you can’t see it, but you know when you’ve lost it.
- My decision making skills closely resemble that of a squirrel when crossing the street.
- If I drove a UPS truck there’s a 100% chance I would fall out of the truck when I turned corners.
- If everyday is a gift then today was socks.
- I call in sick on full moons just to make them wonder.
- Sometimes when I’m feeling lonely, I head on over to Best Buy and pretend to know nothing about my phone.
- I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.
- The world is full of nice people. If you can’t find one, be one.
- If you are ever feeling down just remember that you are 50% mermaid.
- Be the person your dog thinks you are.
- I’m sorry I offended you with my common sense.
- There’s nothing scarier than a squirrel who’s not afraid of you.
- Every time I see an obese cop, a small part of me hopes he has to chase me.
- The fact there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.
- Have you ever partied so hard that you feel like you may have damaged your DNA?
- I don’t know if I have a stalker, but if I do, could you drop off some milk. Thanks.
- My mom used to make sure we were wearing our seat-belts in the back seat by slamming on the brakes. She was a kind soul.
- Karate is just a violent way of making people smell your feet.
- By all means, please continue to tell me how the life you created for yourself is so miserable instead of taking actual steps to change it.
- After a million years of human evolution, man has reached a point where he is now stupider than his telephone.
Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…
“The Way You Make Me Feel” MJ Cover:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMNIvLiCnw8[/youtube]
Wow, that’s one super talented young lady!
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