Welcome back for the weekend laugh attack!  Enjoy and remember to share these funny things with your friends…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked to, but if you press the wrong button..you will be disconnected!
• The lesser of two evils rarely wins the evil contest.
• We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• What did the blonde say when the airplane began to shake? “Must be an earthquake.”
• A save electricity sign: “Don’t you hate it when someone turns you on, and then just leaves?”
• Obama said taxes have gone down during his administration. That’s ONE way to get rid of income tax – getting rid of income. (From @JimmyFallon)
• A mathematician’s favorite place in New York City? Times Square.
• I’m thinking of re-releasing my old statuses in 3D. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• You sacrifice. You fight injustice. You think you’re making a difference. Then you find out Snooki has a book deal.
• If there’s anything more important than my ego around here I want it caught and destroyed immediately.
• Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen. (From @FreeFunnyStuff our twitter account.)
• A baby first laughs at the age of four weeks. By that time his eyes focus well enough to see you clearly.
• I think it’s time Obama puts a viral video on YouTube where he plays a prank on Biden.

Facebook News Alert: High Definition photos coming soon to Facebook!

Funny Pictures to Post:

Who knew that Superman was a kiddo?

Interesting Video to Post:

How weird is that?!?!?!?  Post that video and you’re sure to start a comment fest!  Enjoy the NFL  this weekend, guys. Have a safe and enjoyable weekend!  See you on Monday, folks For some more awesome content throughout the weekend “like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Thanks for stopping by!

Well it isn’t Friday but, at least it is close!  Thursday is here my friends and that means it is almost the weekend.  Laugh your way through Thursday with these funny things to post to your FB…

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Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
• When you go into court, you are putting your fate into the hands of people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• A man without a woman is a bachelor. A woman without a man is a genius.
• Tongue Twister… Q: How many bears would Bear Grylls grill, if Bear Grylls could grill bears? A: As many bears as Bear Grylls’ grill can bear.
• I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• In Japan, JERSEY SHORE is entitled — “The New Jersey Life of Macaroni Rascals.” I am not making this up.
• I believe everything happens for a reason. Usually, the reason is somebody screwed up.
• Gettin’ married is like getting into a bath tub. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.
• At the Pentagon, there are five sides to every story.
• I hate it when a coworker offers to make themselves “perfectly clear” but then I can still see them… and hear them.
• If it isn’t one thing, it’s another. Unless it’s neither.
• It’s bad luck to be superstitious. (From @FreeFunnyStuff our twitter account.)

• I find it helps to organize chores into categories: Things I won’t do now; Things I won’t do later; and, Things I’ll never do.

Funny picture to post:

Don’t worry kid, we’ve all been there.

Awesome video to post:

What an awesome mash-up, it is really catchy!  If you don’t like it now, try again in a few hours… You’ll be singing/thinking about this one all day!!! Make sure to stop back tomorrow for the world famous weekend wrap-up Cya then! If you need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.

Wednesday is here means the weekend is near!  Yuk’ it up with these funny things to post to your fb…

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Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• I told the dog it is weird that he follows me into the bathroom all the time. So he walked out. Now I’m weirded out that he speaks English.
• When discussing geology and erosion, I often get sedimental and break down.
• We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• Just put my ear plugs on and had a near deaf experience.
• Life is not fair, but life is not fair for everyone. That makes life fair.
• If you ever want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans…. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• My doctor told me to avoid unnecessary stress, so I didn’t open his bill.
• BEWARE: Today is Ask a Stupid Question Day. If you work in IT or customer service, you won’t notice a change.
• If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot”, you are wasting everybody’s time.
• My chiropractor schedules his appointments back-to-back.
• Pray for those who persecute you. Also, file a police report, obtain a restraining order, and press charges.
• IRS: We’ve got what it takes to take what you’ve got. (From @FreeFunnyStuff our twitter account.)
• Your mama’s so fat she faces an increased risk of heart disease and type II diabetes.

The road to failure is the path of least persistence.

Funny Picture to Post:

Silly cat thinks he is all big and bad!  Continuing on today’s cat theme…

Funny Video to Post:

That is one angry cat!  Hopefully your Wednesday isn’t as bad as his, haha!!  You probably know some sourpuss that you can throw that on their Facebook wall.  Anyhow, enjoy the rest of your Wednesday we will see you back here tomorrow for more funny stuff to post to your Facebook.  If you need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.  Make sure to stop by tomorrow for more hilarious content.

Da Bears!   Happy Tuesday to you folks.  Laugh your way through this Tuesday with these funny status updates, pics, and videos to post to your Facebook…

*** Think you’re funny?  Prove it, submit your own & vote on Status Updates! ***

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• We are what we eat! – mmm, nuts!
• Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
• Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• I hate Mondays. And Tuesdays. And Wednesdays. And Thursdays. I hate schooldays.
• I named my hard drive That Thang, so once a month my computer asks me if I want to Back That Thang Up.
• WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your undies.
• The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
• Happy 12th birthday to Google. Only one year left to use it, dears! When it becomes a teenager, it won’t answer anything. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• Dont be afraid of change, its inevitable. Unless youre homeless. Then you might have to go around asking for it. By the way, I dont have any.
• Have you stayed at the new luxury hotel in town? It’s a site for soirees.
• People tend to make rules for others and exceptions for themselves. (From @FreeFunnyStuff our red-headed stepchild of a twitter account.)

“Food for thought” seems like a pretty good deal.

Funny Picture to Post:

Silly fox thinks he is a hunter!

Funny Video to Post:

That’s a thinking mans prank! Haha… Please stop in tomorrow for the always funny – mid-week status updates.  Get more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.

Welcome back friends!  Hope you had a wonderful weekend.  Laugh your way through Monday with these funny things you can post to your Facebook account…

*** Feeling funny?  Submit your own & vote on Status Updates! ***

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• I danced like no one was watching. Court date is pending…
• People tend to make rules for others and exceptions for themselves. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers? Men don’t like flowers. I’ve been wearing a great new scent. It’s called New Car Interior.
• Rmbr – dooont fbook whljik you driv. It is dngrou7s.
• There is an official UN appointee for First Contact should aliens arrive. I can’t believe I didn’t get that job.
• Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice.
• I like really dark movie theaters. That way, I don’t have to buy my own popcorn.
• Sometimes, I think the only thing in the grocery store that’s not fat-free is me.
• Filling out a job application. Under ‘Military Experience’ I put that I once went commando for 4 days in a row.
• Aibohphobia: The fear of palindromes.
• Good friends make the world go round, but good tequila makes the room go round. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• If it ain’t broke, don’t let me any.where.near.it.
• They arrested the bartender for taking liquor home. I believe the official charge was emboozlement. (By way of @FreeFunnyStuff our red-headed stepchild of a twitter account.)

He who laughs last might just be in a different time zone.

Funny Picture to Post:

Funny video to Post:

If you think your day is bad, think about that!  hahahahha Enjoy your Monday folks, cya tomorrow!!! Check back tomorrow for more hilarious status updates, pictures, and videos to post to your Facebook or Twitter.  Get more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.